Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Fantastic Hong Kong Beasts and Where to Find Them


Hello from Hong Kong!

It's a beautiful Friday here in our favourite Special Administrative Region and I've decided to write a quick post about animal encounters. I don't know about you, but one of the first things I ask people when they say they've been to a new place is, "what is the wildlife like?"

Last year, in South Africa, I was treated to some of the most spectacular wildlife in the world. Lions, rhinos, elephants, Helen Zille, the list goes on and on! Before that, I'd lived in Australia, which also has a fantastic array of wild creatures, and visited Alaska, where I was treated to whales, grizzlies, mountain goats, moose, and various other majestic beasts.

So, when the decision was made to move to Hong Kong, it was with the sad realization that the animals in the area may not match up to other regions I'd experienced previously in life. I was okay with the decision. Though I'm a huge fan of our animal brethren, I was willing to spend a year or two focusing on great architecture and noodly food - might as well expand other horizons.

To my surprise, we have found a wide array of wild beasts in Hong Kong. Some expected, some surprising - but nothing ordinary. Here are a few highlights:

The Dangerous Jungle Lemur
This beast is fairly common. We first came across it when Simon and I were running up Victoria Peak. After we'd reached the top, we were winding back down at a gentler pace when we heard a rustling in the trees. We looked up and - LEMUR ATTACK! And by attack I mean that we saw one. However, they are far more prevalent in Hong Kong than I would have expected. Perhaps they're refugee lemurs from Madagascar.

The Herculean Demon Spider
This beastie was also encountered upon Victoria Peak, which seems to have a slew of wild creatures. Simon had taken a second to stretch before coming up the peak, so when I was coming back down I ran into him - standing frozen as an ice cube in the middle of the path. I asked him what was wrong and he yelled, voice tight with tension, "Stop right there!"

"What's up?" I queried.

"There is a huge spider somewhere on this path."

Now, dear Simon demonstrates above average bravery when it comes to most things. However, when it comes to small creatures such as spiders, rats, and cockroaches, he gets a little less comfortable. So I assumed that I would find a teensy weensy little spider baby if I looked around long enough.

I decided to walk down anyways and then I saw it.

"Holy Shit!"

The spider was at least the size of my hand, and daddy longlegs it was not. It was thick and hairy and grey and evil. In fact, I'm 95% certain that it starred in that movie "Eight Legged Freaks." It was petrifying.

The Palm Tree Porcupine
Yet another tale from Victoria Peak. Perhaps it is the Galapagos of Hong Kong? Regardless, this was a brief encounter. I'd had a scary experience on the Peak a few days before (which I may blog about someday once I've shaken the post traumatic stress disorder), so I was a bit jumpy. I'd just reached the top when I noticed a shaking off to my left. I stopped - it was a jiggling palm-ish plant. Like a palm tree fern. However, instead of being green, it was a bony kind of colour. I inched closer, wondering what this strange plant could be? Then the plant upped the shaking, going from a mild shaking to full-on epileptic seizing. Then I saw its snout. The plant had a dark, black, bunny snout. Usually plants don't have this feature.

I leapt back like a frog in a stew-pot and braced myself against the stone edge of the Peak. I realized I was looking at a porcupine. I had once seen one in Alaska, but rather than this bony/giant/palm tree thing it had been sad and dark grey.

I decided that getting pined (or porked? ew) by a porcupine was not on my nightly "to-do" list, so I retraced my steps and headed back down the mountain to safety.

The Endangered House Cat
I know what you might be thinking, and I don't think it is true. Seriously, I have seen no evidence of anyone in Asia eating house pets. In fact, there are plenty of dogs (big and small) in the city and none seem to be afraid of being lunch. However, cats seem to be few and far between. Maybe that is because I'm rarely in peoples' houses and often in the street so that could be why I don't see them. But whenever I do come across a kitty, it is either haggard looking (missing tail, etc) or being chased by an old lady. I don't know much about the HK kitty, I just thought I'd provide some food for thought. Whoops!

The Godzilla Bull
Simon and I took a day trip to Lantau, which is Hong Kong's biggest island. While it takes up much more space than the main island, the population is far smaller. We decided to hike from the town where the ferry dropped us to another town across the island (where there was a South African restaurant on the beach that we were eager to try).

Right from the beginning of our sojourn, we noticed a large amount of poo on the pathway (which was right beside the islands main road). It was large livestock poo, and at first we speculated that it may be wild pig poo, as we heard that they inhabited the island. Not to be vulgar, but any Pennsylvanian worth his or her salt knows what pig poo smells like (HORRIBLE) so I figured it was not of piggy origin.

We continued along the path, eventually forgetting about whatever creature it was that was dropping periodic bombs. Then, we rounded a corner, and OH MY GOD. We were faced by the biggest bull I have ever seen. It was like the red bull from The Last Unicorn (see picture at the beginning of the post).

I let out an unholy screech and rocketed across the road like jack in the box. Simon was laughing because he is evil (but gorgeous so I keep him around), and because he is from South Africa where the have the parent species of The Godzilla Bull, known as The Godzilla Jaws Beast Water Buffalo.

We hid behind a steel gate for a bit until the bull had passed us. I looked at Simon incredulously. "How could that monster just roam freely? Don't they make fences in Hong Kong? Won't it eat innocent babies?"

Simon guessed that we probably would have heard about it if innocent people were being killed by bulls on Lantau.

I smell a conspiracy.

For the full story on this, see my better half's blog: http://williamsons-world.blogspot.com/2010/10/island-which-is-called-lantau.html

The Lantau Sea Cow
The Godzilla Bull's lovelier female relative, the sea cow, can also be found on the beautiful island of Lantau. We had just survived our encounter with the bull of death when we found a path leading down to a small beach side town. Everything looked as normal beach towns do, except for a heard of cows walking around on it.

The Lantau Sea Cow is a beautiful and graceful animal and worthy of our affection. I posed for pictures with mothers and babies while Simon recalled bygone days of growing up amongst the cows in the small farm town of Durban in South Africa (I may be exaggerating on that front).

The Taxi Terror
The most dangerous breed of Hong Kong animal, without a doubt, is the taxi terror. The taxi terror will sneak up on you around corners, can run at speeds up to 140 km/h, are often missing integral body parts that impair their ability to function, and are hell bent on disturbing as many people as possible.

The only thing that saves people from the taxi terror is that they will ignore you as soon as you show interest in them. In fact, if you act like you would like to interact with the taxi terror, perhaps even ride in one, it is incredibly likely to avoid you if at all possible. Whew.

The Hong Kong Dog-Maid Symbiot
The Hong Kong Dog-Maid Symbiot is simultaneously the most varied and prevalent animal in Hong Kong. Common varieties have a lapdog base, usually of poodle or corgi origin. Other common bases are the Labrador and bulldog varieties. What all of these have in common is that they are all attached, usually by a leash (sometimes by hand or though vocal command), to a Filipino woman.

The symbiot is most often seen between the hours of 7 and 12 in the evening, likely when the Filipino ladies are finished helping with dinner and have time to walk the dog. Very, very rarely you will see a dog attached to a Chinese or Caucasian man or woman, but that is almost unicorn-rare.

The symbiot is also the friendliest of Hong Kong animal species on both its dog and woman sides, though occasionally you will meet a muzzled one. It is difficult to communicate with the woman half of the creature, as it usually attached to a cellular device.

*I don't want to be offensive about Filipino maids, so please do comment and let me know if I've said anything that can be taken the wrong way. As I've said, I've only met friendly women walking dogs in Hong Kong. I am alarmed by the shocking amount of Filipino women who have to leave home in order to earn enough money to support their families back in the Philippines, but I don't yet know enough about the subject to speculate.

I hope you find this guide moderately useful in the case that you visit Hong Kong. If any of our friends come to visit, Simon and I will be happy to take you for a safari tour of Hong Kong and its majestic beasts.

:) Mike

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